Memorable Quotes

Disclaimer:

This is an equal-opportunity quote page. By that I mean that I do my best to make fun of everyone (meaning both individuals and groups) equally.

In these quotes you're likely to find suggestions of sexism, racism, beastiality, prostitution, homosexuality, homophobia, foul language, alcoholism, various illegal acts, general bad taste, etc., etc., etc. Please try to keep in mind that these quotes were quite intentionally left without any of the relevant context as to the situation in which they were said.

As you read the following quotes, please keep in mind that just because I said something or found what someone else said humorous does NOT necessarily mean that I agree with it. I find "shock humor" to be a wonderful form of comedy. I am able to find some inherent humor in most of life, including situations that are entirely repugnant to my personal morality.

If you are at all unsure of your ability to maintain a sense of humor while reading these quotes, I would strongly encourage you to A) find your entertainment elsewhere; and B) chill out.

Quotes said by Aiello

 
Aiello: The code was flowing from my fingers faster than bullshit excuses from CS 180 students. [link]
 
Aiello: This is -- FUCK! [link]
Terry: ...Yeah, that's Dan announcing that it's a fuck, since he's so small the girls don't actually have a chance of, you know, FEELING IT.  
 
Aiello: You know what the difference between marriage and dating is? When you're dating you only pay for sex on the nights you get laid. When you're married you pay EVERY DAY OF YOUR LIFE. [link]
Brad: Yeah, I'm really finding this paying for sex thing is getting expensive.

*(At this point, Luda, one of Brad's female students, walks by and gives him a *very* weird look.)*
 
 
Aiello: I'm just full of tasty treats tonight! [link]
 
Aiello: I think I'd use four ARP tables. [link]
Terry: And a knapsack, 'cause we both know they can solve any problem.  
 
Aiello: We've done an amazingly good job of monopolizing these backends today. [link]
Terry: You know, no backend is safe when we're in town.  
 
Aiello: Does "less" do regular expressions? [link]
Terry: Does my cock tie itself in knots?

(Pause)

...That doesn't really answer your question, does it?
 
 
Aiello: Will everyone please look at the note on the overhead...? [link]
Adam R.: I hate to be difficult, but....
*(Adam is a blind student who has a great sense of humor)*
 
 
Aiello: Citrus-flavored ass. Mmmmmmm.... [link]
 
Aiello: You stalker. [link]
Brad: I call it being thorough.  
 
Keith: So this standard was developed by a bunch of European countries who wanted to defend their turf. [link]
Aiello: ...Certainly not France.  
 
Terry: Well, hopefully this spring break won't be as expensive as last one. [link]
Aiello: Well, it's not like I can miss the car.  

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